Marrying Their Mistakes: A Growing Trend Among Couples

Marrying Their Mistakes: A Growing Trend Among CouplesI recently attended a wedding ceremony and was struck by the prominent presence of reverend sisters and various Catholic church activities at the reception. It all made sense when a friend explained that the bride was a devoted churchgoer. She added, “Only someone like her would say yes to him. Do you think young women today would consider him? He doesn’t even own a car.”....KINDLY READ THE FULL STORY HERE▶

I countered, “But they’d readily accept a 70-year-old man.” This impatience with processes and timelines seems to doom this generation. The young man is just starting his career as a legal professional, and he has a promising future ahead. Many successful married men today often recount how their ex-girlfriends left them for wealthier partners, only to find themselves struggling later.

Years ago, I met a beautiful and friendly young woman who lived near a friend. When a mutual friend sought a wife, I discreetly asked her about her ideal partner. She insisted, “He must live on Lagos Island, specifically not beyond Lekki Phase One. He should have a generator, a nice car, and a driver.”

When I mentioned a potential suitor based in an African country, she dismissed the idea. I knew better than to explain that he worked for a multinational in Angola. I wouldn’t want that mindset for my son. I recall a couple from Abuja; one night, when the wife returned home late, her husband demanded to know her whereabouts. She challenged his authority in a house he didn’t fund, and things escalated. Within an hour, military personnel arrived to take him away, ending their marriage. He later married a banker who seemed to provide stability, but he overlooked how someone with little experience could afford such a lifestyle.

People seeking spouses often overlook suitable partners due to their rigid expectations. This disdain for modest beginnings leads many to marry the wrong person. A friend in the U.S. met a woman on social media. For many Nigerian girls, only opportunities in the U.S., U.K., or Canada matter. She seemed perfect, and he returned home to marry her, planning for her to join him later. He even got her pregnant before leaving.

Six years later, their marriage is crumbling, with discussions of dissolution. He finds her demands for money overwhelming, especially after she had their child. Despite claiming her job pays little, she insists on supporting her family with her income. Now, his family is considering nullifying the marriage.

The men who find peace are those who marry women who aren’t merely fantasies. Many overlook hardworking women around them, choosing instead to rush home and marry those they barely know through social media. Keeping such a partner at home while only visiting occasionally adds to the strain.

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